THE DIARY GAME | A slow and quiet day at home| 18-06-2026.

welcome back to another great diary session with @amari.xo29 Today I woke up feeling this overwhelming feeling of sadness and heaviness. I didn’t step out all day and my appetite was just not there at all but I eventually had only this bread and egg with just water.

At the moment life feels like a lot for me to handle and truly life has been heavy for a while. In the midst of trying to get myself together and also survive the harsh times, it had me thinking. Getting older, I haven’t come to respect the firmness of God. I fully came to understand that you cannot manipulate Him. He will prosper and punish whom He wills. There’s only how far hard work can get you. You need a crazy amount of grace and mercy from Him for things to work out for you(if He chooses).

I used to think that when life hits back to back with challenges, there was a limit to suffering, that if you suffered a bit more today, God would be manipulated or feel guilty to hold back the pain and shower you with blessings because your eyes has seen enough. Lmao, I was wrong. I was greatly humbled when I realized bad things can happen in 10’s. You could be trying to recover from one, 5 more hits you at the same time.

It just never ends. Bad news. Consistently. Concurrently. Simultaneously. All at once. Forever and ever. So, how do you survive such overwhelming negativity? How does one hold it together and not fall apart? By staying in the positive side always. Oh it’s painful and it’s hard and you could feel yourself losing it but it will get better. Or you get stronger? I honestly don’t know. But the main aim of this post was to acknowledge the firmness of God. You have to respect the work rate.

Later in the evening, my neighbor came to check on me and got me this food which is what I had tonight before I’ll be heading to bed soon.

I don’t have much activities to share about my day today because I spent the entire day in my room without stepping out. So instead, I thought to share a bit of my inner thoughts with you guys. Reminiscing, scrolling through the internet and surviving. I hope tommorow is better and has more to offer.