The BuddyUp word of the week is Freedom. This word gives me all the feels. I've got an ongoing thought process about the varying levels of freedom that show up in my life.

This topic also makes me think of another community I'm a part of, @freedomtribe, and how freedom is important to all of us.

I could write several blog posts on this topic. I just might. Maybe I already have.

Here's one timely train of thought...

Freedom is happiness. Happiness is a choice.

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Happiness is a choice. It's a state of mind. Granted, it's a lot easier to be happy when all your needs are provided for, but even in my relatively luxurious surroundings, depression has been a thing. Depression is a thing for a lot of people. In my experience, it's the exact opposite of freedom.

I've learned ways to refocus, to remember how much I have to be grateful for, and find ways to meet whatever needs aren't getting met. Sometimes, I just need to get out of the house into nature, other times I need a heart-to-heart with a friend, complete with a lot of laughter.

I am privileged to live in a beautiful place, in a house that we own, with two wonderful children and a good man who works his ass off for his family. He was up till midnight a couple nights ago working on the house—the house that has been slowly built over the past six years.

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I've felt trapped here, in this mountain paradise, trapped by the responsibility of motherhood. I've turned into a stay at home mom who trades the freedom of choosing what she wants to do for doing what's best for the kids.

I'm the only child of two ambitious educators. When I was a little girl and you asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I never would've answered "mother." But the way I look at things has changed.

I've finally gotten to the place where I've embraced being a mother. I've grown into it.

That doesn't mean it's easy, but it does mean I don't feel trapped anymore.

I've accepted that I love living here, and I don't need to move anywhere else. Moving wouldn't fix anything, really—if I can't be happy here, that's on me. That's my perspective that needs changing. My kids can go to school here (giving me more freedom), and if that doesn't work I'll homeschool them and we'll find other part-time school options.

But here is good.

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Here is good.

That shift in perception is HUGE for me. Here is good. I don't need to go anywhere. I can settle the fuck down and plant roots. I've been here six years and I only find more love for my community. Time to relax into it, to trust that I'm in the right place.

Did I mention I've spent my life running? We all do, in some way. It's a human thing.

What I'm getting at is that for a while I looked at my life from a lens of “this isn't what I want—there isn't enough freedom here,” and now I'm choosing to embrace what I have and who I am, knowing I'll keep growing.

And I'm happy. Halefuckinluja!

To me, that's freedom.

Freedom is much more than happiness.

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Freedom is an inner perspective, but it is also an outer experience.

It's something every being deserves on this planet of free choice, but outer freedom can be even harder to come by. There are some other great articles out there on this topic right now, including ones by @snook and @enginewitty. Check 'em out—you'll find some great thoughts (and music).

And please let me know in the comments if you've written on this subject lately!

Thanks for reading. :)

Whatever happens, keep singing your song!

Peace. @katrina-ariel

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Author bio: Katrina Ariel is an old-soul rebel, musician, tree-hugging yogini, and mama bear to twins. Author of Yoga for Dragon Riders (non-fiction) and Wild Horse Heart (romance), she's another free-spirit swimming in the ocean of life. Check out her music here: https://choon.co/artists/katrina-ariel/

^{Dragon art commissioned from Liiga Smilshkalne.}

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