My Fucking Elf

My Fucking Elf wanted a radiator that they would often try to nail to the wall. It would be a bizarre operation, to me and my parents, but not to the Elf, who had decided it would be simply life. Who would have thought, a radiator is the thing that was chosen.

My Fucking Elf had a can of coke that they would sometimes eat. One might consider this to be a fairly unusual thought, to many, but not to the Elf, who had come to the conclusion that it was in fact, spectacular. Remarkably, a can of coke having that done to it

My Fucking Elf had a pint of beer to try to balance on their head. One might find this to be an original undertaking, to my mum, but not to the Elf, who expected it was amazing. A pint of beer is the thing to opt for.

My Fucking Elf needed a radiator that they would rub on his belly. It should be a strange approach to life, to most, but not to the Elf, who considered that it was in fact, epic. You wouldnt have imagined, a radiator is the thing that was chosen.

My Fucking Elf desperately wanted a vibrator that they would sometimes cuddle. One might say this is a weird suggestion, to you, but not to the Elf, who expected that this idea is magnificent. Honestly, a vibrator would be the chosen thing.

My Fucking Elf always carried a cup that they would often drop. It is considered to be an odd operation, to me, my mum and my dad, but not to the Elf, who feels that the idea was miraculous. Who would have imagined, a cup of all things.