Are You Ashamed Of Your Past Self?

in #life8 years ago (edited)

When looking back at old Facebook posts or videos of yourself, are you ashamed or proud?

As always, watch the 1 minute video, or read on below, or even better, do both! :)


The Past Is Over
As my teacher Dr. Richard Bandler always says: The best thing about the past is that it is over. So people allow what has happened in the past to dictate how the act and feel in the present. This is understandable because of the way we have been taught about human psychology, yet in reality it is bananas! You see, the past is not the reality, it is (at least for now) unchangeable, and does not influence your current situation at all, despite what you may have been led to believe. Therefore, it is okay to think about the past now and then, as long as you don't live there.

We All Want To Learn
So most of the people here on Steemit will agree: learning, developing and investing in yourself is very important. Yet what we sometimes forget is that, if we actually become 'better' at something, 'wiser', 'smarter' or 'more true to ourselves', that this can actually have resulted in a massive change in thinking, personality and behaviour. Therefore when we look back at ourselves a few months ago, let alone a few years, we can see incredible progress when looking forward, or scare the crap out of ourselves by looking back. OMG was this me?

Be Proud
Let's be honest here, the more stupid you feel about looking back at your former self, the better off you are. It simply means that you have learned, changed, developed, grown. All the goals you set for yourself in personal development have been reached or at least completed to great extend. It is when you look back and don't notice any change between the 'you' today and the 'you 5 years ago', that you should start to feel a little worried ;)

Video Transcript:
Do you ever scroll back on your Facebook wall like two or three years ago and you read the stuff that you posted and go like: Oh My God, why did I say that stuff. Or maybe you've been watching back some home videos that you made five or ten years ago and you think I was so horrendous back then. Well if that's the case be happy! For two reasons! First of all the past is over, it is in the past, it doesn't exist anymore. You are a different person right now. Second it means that you've actually developed a lot. You've learned a lot which means that by now you think of that older version of yourself as somebody who is being retarded. Now if you read back your facebook posts, three or five years ago, and you think mmm that actually makes a lot of sense. Then either you were really really smart back then, or you simply didn't learn anything in the past years.

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Nice ..
You are absolutely right .. wonderful words from you, well done
Thanks for sharing this with us

Thanks @slimanepro so nice to have you reading all my posts :)

The past is is unchangeable, and if you can't change something, you shouldn't worry about it I completely agree. Sometimes I cringe of the silly things I've said or done in the past. Generally when I'm in the shower I think about it and scrub my hair or face really hard with soap, lol. But yes when you look at your past and say OMG, it is because you have grown. Great write up. Cheers.

Thanks @jfitmisc yeah you're right! We cannot change it. So just learn from it, and think back with a smile :)

Also, don't rub your face to hard with soap man, what if it comes off? :P

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Thank you @transparencybot :) yes I use upvotebots to promote my work because I think it is of value, I hope you agree. Much rather promote content here than on facebook bleh...

I'm not ashamed of my past but it could have been better.
And if I get a chance I little bit of it.😈

Haha yeah! :)

Hahah not really but some pictures you thought looked great back then don't look so nice now.

Yes I have that too! :) but I'm never really happy with my pictures @mydivathings

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It's absolutely important to keep growing and developing yourself. I really like the example of Neil Strauss, who had an interesting development that he documented in several books over a decade:

Start out as a guy with no romantic life, clueless about women.

Develop into the world's greatest pick-up artist and started relationship with famous female singer.

After several monogamous relationships, explore all arrangements of polyamory and alternative lifestyles.

Return to one woman, declare his true love and build a healthy, monogamous family with her.

What a journey eh?

Ah I think I heard about that guy in Lewis Howes' book Mask of Masculinity but I'm not sure if that's the same dude :) yeah it's an incredible journey :)

I have used mindfulness techniques to live in the present, not the past or future. Looking back and focusing on negative experiences held me back and kept me living in fear. I have PTSD.
Also i found that predicting the future was a problem for me. I could never go in to a situation without trying to predict my immediate future by using my negative experience of the past as indicators...
A real terrible way to live.. It's just an ever increasing cycle of fear and inevitable violence.
Using mindfulness techniques after counselling taught me to use them was the way forward for me. I'm in no way cured but I'm managing to fight through my demons and enjoy my life..
I have become spiritual.
Thanks for your post, it was thought provoking for me..

@theaverageman I'm happy to hear you have been able to find a way to let your past go, partially or fully.

The only tip I would give you based on what you said is, if it helps you, if not, just ignore it:

You cannot have ptsd, it is not a thing. You 'do' ptsd. Therefore I hope you will do less and less of ptsd every single day because it is not helpful to you and a waste of energy.

You are right, i do "do" PTSD. it's something that i never realized i had. When i was diagnosed as suffering PTSD i was able to challenge some of my fears. Anxiety is a reaction, sometimes not logical, to any given situation. It can cripple you with fear...

Well what I don't like about diagnosis is that it doesn't just put a label on you, it takes away your control. Because if something 'is' it cannot be changed or influenced. Also you probably don't 'have' ptsd when you have to pee real bad. So this means you are not 'doing' ptsd the whole day. You have specific moments where you do it, and moments where you don't. That's why I'm not a big fan of diagnosis the way it is being done currently.