The Lovely Martian

The Lovely Martian desperately wanted a pint of beer that they sometimes play with. It was considered to be a fairly extraordinary action, to everybody you know, but not to the Martian, who considered that this idea was entertaining. Strangely, a pint of beer would be the item that was chosen.

The Lovely Martian found a big sponge that they would play with. It might be a strange thought, to my grandpa, but not to the Martian, who thinks that this idea was awesome. Strangely, a big sponge is the thing to opt for.

The Lovely Martian desperately looked for a little monkey that they would occasionally put up their bum. It should have been a fairly curious exercise, to me and my parents, but not to the Martian, who thinks that it was in fact, the most awesome idea. Bizarrely, a little monkey being the thing opted for.

The Lovely Martian needed a rubber chicken to insert somewhere. This seems to be a somewhat surprising idea, to me and my parents, but not to the Martian, who assumed that this idea is entertaining. Who would have thought, a rubber chicken of all things.

The Lovely Martian desperately needed a condom that they would often put in the bath with him. It was a curious thing to do, to my mum, but not to the Martian, who expected it was magnificent. A condom would be the thing that was chosen.

The Lovely Martian desperately desired a set square that they would often eat. It was a fairly new operation, to my children, but not to the Martian, who assumed that the idea was sublime. Bizarrely, a set square was the thing that was chosen.