The Fucking Monkey

The Fucking Monkey found a pint of cider that they liked to throw. It might be a strange activity, to me and my husband, but not to the Monkey, who had decided that it was in fact, magnificent. Honestly, a pint of cider is the thing to choose.

The Fucking Monkey desperately craved for a big sponge to sit and look at. It should have been a strange exercise, to my children, but not to the Monkey, who considered that it was in fact, entertaining. Bizarrely, a big sponge is the item to choose.

The Fucking Monkey looked for a tomato that they sometimes worship. This seems a fairly extraordinary suggestion, to my grandpa, but not to the Monkey, who feels that this idea was spectacular. Who would have thought, a tomato was the chosen item.

The Fucking Monkey craved for a CD player that they would sometimes try to nail to the wall. This seems a fairly odd activity, to my grandpa, but not to the Monkey, who had come to the conclusion it would be entertaining. Strangely, a CD player being the chosen item.

The Fucking Monkey owned a toilet brush to sleep with. This could be considered a fairly strange proposal, to my neighbour, but not to the Monkey, who expected it would be the most awesome idea. Strangely, a toilet brush being the thing opted for.

The Fucking Monkey always carried a wig that they would occasionally drop. It might be a peculiar activity, to most, but not to the Monkey, who expected that this idea was awesome. Remarkably, a wig of all things.